Thursday, October 18, 2012

Tonight is a hard night.  This is Kat.  I am really feeling depressed.  I don't know why...maybe it's because I have had this damn awful burning in my throat from not eating.  I tried to eat little bits through out the day but it still hurts. 

 It could be a mood swing.  No need for reasons with those.  I am here alone for a bit tonight but, that does not bother me. 

 I met with my best friend yesterday.  We each drove 2 hours to see each other.  We do it every 6 months.  She is great and very uplifting.  She does not know about the DID.  I know she is my best friend and she knows almost everything about me but not that.  I am afraid she just would not understand.  I have actually lost a friend when she was afraid I had a "serial killer" inside and didn't want to risk it.  It was silly.  She had a phobia of serial killers and I think she saw the Evil One come out once.  That was enough to scare anyone away.  

Shit I am just feeling badly tonight.  I NEVER cry and yet here I go.  I hate to cry.  I just feel like shit.  I think Littlebit wants out and I am busy with computer stuff.  She will have to have her time tonight. 

 I really did hate losing that friend.  She was like Mariah...intuitive like that.  She and I had different temperaments but, I thought we were good together...as friends.  Anyway, just had to write.  I will feel better later.

Kat

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