Hi Everybody!
We have not posted lately because, quite frankly, no one had he energy to do it. I am finally off Geodon and the heartburn is gone. I lost 5 pounds, started taking a new med and I gained 5 pounds. I went back down to 1 mg where I don't gain weight. I found out that we are pre-diabetic and I need to exercise more. I became pre-diabetic with the onset of the extra weight with the cancer meds. I am thinking that when I get off these meds and start losing weight that things will change. Oh this is Kat btw. Mariah is all upset about all this but, I seem to take it in stride. Lisa, my therapist, actually knew that I was not out because I was not reacting as myself. Mariah said that she was the one that was out. Way to go Lisa!
I went to see the doctor and got so irritated with her because she just kept saying, "You need to eat more." She said this several times. Finally I said emphatically, I know I need to eat more but, I can't right now. I have an eating disorder that won't let me. It's very easy to say eat more and hard to do it. She got it and changed her approach, To discussing what I might be able to eat...like a half of a chicken breast. She is a good doctor and is trying. She acknowledged my worry that when I get off these meds in a year or 2 that I am going to really lose weight. Leah and Angela are so into that. I am but I worry more than anything. We could get emaciated so easily,. I, Kat, am scared. The only ones that are not scared are Leah and Angela.
I am talking to my oncologist, who I see this month, about being pre-diabetic because of this drug and the weight gain. Is it still important that I continue taking it? I feel so torn. This could be the e.d. in me not wanting to take it. On the other hand I don't want to get cancer again.
So you see we have been going though some things. Sometimes it is hard to write about them
Kat
This is me right now.
This is how we are most of the time.
