I Don't Want to Eat Anything Anymore

This is Angela.  It is the first time I have posted in this blog.  I don't come out very much.  I am tired all the time.  

I have decided that I don't want to eat anything anymore.  I will eat enough to control the headaches minimally but that is it.  I am too fat and ugly to eat anything.  It is all gluttony and I don't deserve it.  My life is filled with depression and I am lost.  I want to cut myself so bad but the others won't let me.  They seem to have control over that.  I don't know how much control I will have with not eating anything.  The husband may get in the way of it.  But I am stubborn and strong willed and I will win.

This body is so fat and disgusting.  I can't believe the body is so old.  When did that happen?

I think I will make this print blue.  I like blue.

I have been able to look at Tumblr a lot lately.  I love looking at the thinsperation.  I want to be so thin that I disappear and no one can see me.  So no one can look at me.  They tell me I need to come out and talk to Lisa but that scares me.  What if she puts me in the hospital?  The body is so fat right now and the medicine controls the fatness.  I would gain so much if I ate what they want me too.  Lisa says I am starving but I don't think so.

That's it.