Here We Go Again

This is Kat.  Another mood swing and down I go.  I always know I am having one because I get this sinking feeling and often I just get the thought of wanting to die.  I start thinking about how I can combine my meds to make myself sleep for a long time.  This tells me there is something definitely wrong.

I am also getting tons of headaches.  Daily headaches.  It is starting to wear on me.  I have to watch how much headache med I take because it is possible to get rebound headaches.  That is just a viscous cycle.

I am just so tired. 

I Need Sleep!!

I am Leah.  It has been very hard lately.  The body is not sleeping.  Everyone thinks it is because of a new cancer drug we are taking that causes insomnia.  Patients and the pharmacists says it can cause insomnia but the doctor says it can't.  We think the doctor does not want to admit it.  We goes nights without sleep.  Even Trazadone does not get us to sleep.  This is the last drug I can try.  The doctor said I could go off the drug but it would double our chances of relapsing.  DID symptoms get worse without sleep.  Mariah is working when we don't sleep.  She can work at Oranum anytime she can get make-up on.

Someone is damaging the body and it is NOT me.  They are hurting the chest.  They are getting up in the middle of the night and damaging the body.  Finally, Littlebit came out and told Katz cause no one else was going to.  Katz immediately wanted to hospitalize.  Kat hurriedly came out and told her that we were not suicidal and intensive outptt was not nec.  Katz put us on Abilify and increased the Prozac which made her fill better.  I don't think anything is gonna help till we can lose weight and get off this fucking med.  This is Kat.

I hate pink print.  I am fairly discouraged.  That's it folks.  Oh and we are depressed but not so much that someone else would notice it.  It is just hard to take a shower, hard to keep focus, etc