And Back Down We Go

This is Mariah.  We have gone into another Depression.  2 weeks ago we swung down but didn't have any "weird thoughts".  In other words, thoughts of suicide.  We swung back up to normal or a little manic for a little bit and now back down.  My doctor is booked as she only works afternoons.  My therapist fit me in this week.  I am afraid she is gonna want to hospitalize me.  I am gonna look for a new doctor because this one just does not work enough hours and is very rigid.  

It is hard for me to hold my head up and keep my eyes open.  my face does not want to change expressions.  I could not work today and this is unusual because I always work.  I also cried a lot today.  We rarely cry.  It is just not something that we do...even when depressed. So things do not look good.

Catch up

This has been a busy 2 months.  This is Mariah.  I have been working a lot along with Kat.  Leah and Angela continue to hassle us about food.  But there are 2 big pieces of new...

We had a cancer scare.  I had calcification in my left breast and the doctor took a biopsy.  It was negative and all is well.

We also got a new dog.  Yay!  She is adorable.  Part Pit.  She get alsong with everyone and everything.  The worst thing about her is that she has accidents.  She is a rescue.  She is 7 month old.  I am grateful.

I have to admit...even with all the good things I feel like the big D is coming back.  We are just telling ourselves that we are having a bad day.  It's hard to make myself work on webcam.  Kat and I both have a hard time being this outgoing, friendly, and vivacious person on camera.

Will let you know more about how the depression progresses.  Hopefully it will just go away.

Mariah