This is Mariah. We have gone into another Depression. 2 weeks ago we swung down but didn't have any "weird thoughts". In other words, thoughts of suicide. We swung back up to normal or a little manic for a little bit and now back down. My doctor is booked as she only works afternoons. My therapist fit me in this week. I am afraid she is gonna want to hospitalize me. I am gonna look for a new doctor because this one just does not work enough hours and is very rigid.
It is hard for me to hold my head up and keep my eyes open. my face does not want to change expressions. I could not work today and this is unusual because I always work. I also cried a lot today. We rarely cry. It is just not something that we do...even when depressed. So things do not look good.
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